Ya know what? Last night was my best Friday night up here yet. It was awesome.

I did write about First Tracks in here, but for those who don't remember, it was a trip into the mountains I went on over the summer with some other incoming freshmen of CSU. There were ten of us, which was an awesome number, and we had such a great time.

Anyway, I've been trying to plan a reunion where we can go to the CSU challenge course two weeks from tomorrow, and we had some group paperwork to do, so I notified everyone in advance and checked with them the times that would work and such for us to get together and do our stuff. The meeting time was yesterday at 6:45 PM, and I sent out several emails on top of calling people or telling them in person so they would remember.

Only FIVE of us showed up. Including me, of course.

One girl had a legitimate excuse. She was camping with her boyfriend who lives in a different state and whom she rarely gets to see.

One guy had frat stuff...I know that frat stuff is really demanding when you're merely a pledge. I've heard some horror stories about pledging from my dad who did the frat thing when he was in college.

But three others...THREE others just BLEW US OFF!!! I love them, don't get my wrong--they're my First tracks buds, but...come on! I mean, what the hell? I have no respect for people blowing me off. Especially when I take the initiative to plan such things, and it takes such a chunk out of my time.

But five of us were there. We played Palace, our official First Trackers card came, and then ate Chinese food, and hung out. It was really fun. I know a lot of people didn't show up, but it was sooooo good to see these guys. Every single person is has just so many qualities and virtues, and it was great to see them again. I guess I said that already. But....yay! That's all I can say.

After we were done hanging out, playing frisbee, and watching Pirates of the Carribean, my hall decided to be cool for once and hang out! It was awesome. One girl was teaching a guy a dance, and they were going up and down the halls with rich enthusiasm behind each dance step.

Sooooo much fun!

Then we just all sat down and talked, and before I knew it, it was nearly two in the morning. No wonder I was so tired! Man, oh man. So I went to bed.

Good night, huh?

Good night! Woo hoo!

Mm, pizza.

Actually, I didn't eat pizza. I ate a chicken sandwich.

But pizza woulda been good.

Wait, ew. Not pizza. Garlic bread.

Mmm. Garlic bread would have been good.

I'm about to hit the wall again. Can you tell?

I can.

But then again, I'm the person inside my body, who can therefore tell when I'm exhausted and running on the final patch of energy.

Ya know what? I hate politics. And I'm pissed at myself for bringing them up on my once peaceful little bloggy.

Yes, I'm a democrat. But I don't hate republicans. My daddy's a republican, for crying out loud. And he's awesome.

But ya know, whatever. I'm just against war. So I'm a democrat. War's mean. I mean, come on. The Christians on my floor are beating their heads against the wall everytime people go on about how the war's bad. But what did Jesus say, huh?

"Those who bear the sword shall perish from it."

So, if Jesus said that, then why don't they agree since they SAY that Bush is a Christian and they support him for his Christian values?

K, I'm done. If you're a republican AND you support Bush and the war, I still love you. As long as you don't go over there to support it and get yourself killed. Then, I'll be sad.

In the meantime, garlic bread is good. And so are cashews.

Damn, I'm like a pregnant woman. But I swear, I'm not pregnant! I'm just craving cashews.

Mmm. Cashews. Garlic Bread.

You know what's weird? So many people spend hours on end imagining worlds that would be better than our own. For example, Harry Potter. Wouldn't it be cool to be able to do MAGIC? Wouldn't it be totally awesome to have the ability to wave a wand and say "lumos," and then have light? I mean...seriously. It's like being God. It's like..."And then...there was light!" And then there really WAS light. And then, you said "Hm...wingardium...leviosa!" And you could make anything you wanted float freely through the air.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a cool life.

But then! THEN WHAT? It's not like people can just live with a fantasy story. Then, you have to create Lord Voldemort. And a horrible death scene where a young boy experiences the brutal murder of his parents. And, for crying out loud, creatures that only people who have experienced death can see. How dark is that?

And why is it that we always CRAVE such dark elements in a story? Why can't we simply settle with the happiness of it all?

Well, because we see the story-line unfold. We're waiting for the climax, and the resolution. We're waiting for Harry to get beat up, be laying with his face in the dirt, and then for him to get up--mustering every bit of energy he has left in his body--and to kick the shit out of Voldemort. And when he's done with that, to fall in love with a girl who will save him from his total, complete agony. And for him to realize that when he dies and goes to heaven that he'll see his parents, and that for know he gets to have wild monkey sex with the girl of his dreams, have babies, make a crapload of money and ride off into the sunset.

And guess what? I see a pattern here. I see that we can't be satisfied with idealism, that no matter what we do when creating a fantastic story, we have to add conflict, we have to add pain and anguish and suffering...and then a story about overcoming it.

Is it any different from life?

Absolutely not.

My point is that no matter how painful life gets--and I kid you not, it can be excruiciatingly painful at times--there is no such thing as a world more beautiful than this. Period.

Why? Because we get to LEARN! Because it hurts, and it sucks, but then we come to some reality on how it really should be. We learn not to take crap from the people walking all over us. We learn to walk with confidence, we learn to love, we learn to take risks and we learn that no one can make us feel inferior without our personal consent. (Courtesy to Eleanor Roosevelt)

And, I know, it's a little more complicated than that. We don't resolve EVERYTHING in this life. Some people take a lot longer to get it than others. But I can assure you that everyone will get it eventually. Because that's the way momentum is headed.

And, my point. We always want to run away from life. But no matter what we do, or how hard we try, we can't create a world any different than the concept of ours. There's no such thing as a world more exquisitely gorgeous than ours.

And no, we may not be able to say "lumos" and create light--but every creative story has its aspects of beauty, as does ours. Just look around you. Ever seen the ice cream man come down the street in his truck, and all the kids come out of their little houses with big smiles on their faces and the little coins clenched in their teeny fists from their piggy banks? Ever watched a team pull together during the imperative minutes of a competition, how they support one-another? How when they overcome a difficult obstacle, they come together, join hands, smile and celebrate? Have you ever experienced being with someone you cared for when it was really cold, and pulled together to stay warm?

The world is so beautiful. And I'm glad I'm here. I hope you are, too.

Who would have ever thought that prehistoric man had even an ounce of intelligence?

I'm not talking about prehistory as in Egypt, during the ages of massive empires and such. I'm talking about Homo Erectus, over 200,000 years ago. When people were in the process of evolving from apes to humans.

Ever heard of flint knapping? I have. I'd actually read about it more than ever in THE EARTH CHILDREN SERIES by Jean Auel. Good books, gotta tell ya. Jean Auel's characters were Cro Magnons, coexisting in Europe with the now extinct Neanderthals approximately 30,000 years ago during the ice age. The hero, Jondalar, was a sophisticated flint knapper.

But that was 30,000 years ago, the dawn of man as we know it. 200,000 years ago, we wouldn't even recognize homo erectus as being our own species. And yet they knapped flint, obsidian, and other materials into rather useful tools. My professor told me before the video he showed us to demonstrate how these people built the tools they used to survive that it was outstanding, and required as much intelligence as it took for us to transport a man to the moon.

I didn't believe him.

I can't really describe how cool it is, watching someone build tools with a regular rock and another rock. I couldn't have ever imagined that it could be so complicated, and require such an amount of intellect and planning. All you have to do is hit it the wrong way and the entire tool you were attempting to build would shatter into a million pieces. In order to shape it into a useful tool that could cut meat, skin hides--or whatever survival demanded at that particular moment--it required understanding the physics and technique of flint knapping incredibly well. The archaeologist conducting the demonstration would indicate the angles and amount of pressure needed before he struck his tool and removed flakes, and it seemed to be rather clear that the people designing and crafting these tools weren't dummies.

And yes, I believe that creating those techniques took as much intelligence as it took to land a man on the moon. See, everything in society builds up. Meaning one person discovers one thing, another learns it and then with the previous knowledge can discover something on top of that--which might be considerably more sophisticated, but couldn't have done that without the previous discoveries. Therefore, discovering how to build a tool without any previous knowledge and discovering how to build a spaceship to go to the moon with previous knowledge are about the same thing.

Not to say that one person one day just decided to build a tool and did it in one go. I'm sure the homo erectuses got in their little caves together and worked on tools. But that's how it's always been. With any technology. People work together to do wonders, not alone.

Yay for the homo erectuses! Or is it the homo erecti?